Hello Friends and Family – Wow, what a ride this has been! I have been so blessed and so amazed that it is hard to know how to start to tell you all that is on my heart. So, I am in Leg 4 – Recovery from Treatment.
I guess first I should just begin with how I am physically. I went back to work this week. Time to get ready for the new school year and there is always lots of planning to do, but this year especially as I consider that I will not be here for some amount of time. I hit the ground running and have felt really well. My body seems, in many ways, to be healthier than before the chemo and radiation. My doctors are somewhat stunned at how well I did, and how I have recovered. There is a “BUT” though! But…I realized I MAY have overdone it a bit when Thursday afternoon came. About 1pm, I just couldn’t go no more! I ran and ran until I just couldn’t ran no more! I ran out of steam early on Friday too. So, I have tried to slow down a bit this weekend. BUT – I will be back at it tomorrow on Monday as I have another busy week ahead and still much to be done for school.
This coming week is exciting for a few reasons. I look forward to seeing more of a recovery and being able to run this race a little better this week. I have post-treatment PET CT scan scheduled for Tuesday. It will be exciting to see what God has truly done in healing me. Then I meet with my surgeon on Thursday to plan for my actual surgery. Finally, on Friday, we head out of town for a family vacation. I admit, I have been a little jealous of all the trips I have seen and heard everyone taking this year, while I have had to sit the summer out. But truly, I have been on a pretty amazing trip myself, as I realize all that God has done for me this season. Still, it will be nice to get away from home for a short time and just be a tourist.
What I am really excited to share though, is what I look forward to in the coming season. God promised to deliver me, and He has. I feel that so surely in how I came through treatment. My doctors have just been amazed at how well I have done. They do this every day – their surprise tells me something – I am a miracle!
But now there is the 3rd part of my grand plan – “You will glorify me” says God in my special verse, Psalms 50:15. Two months ago, I took that as an obligation. Something that I would be required to do. I worried that I would not be sufficient for the task, I would fail Him, after He had somehow delivered me. But now I realize, that even that is part of His promise. I WILL glorify Him. Not maybe, not try, not should – I WILL!!! Doesn’t He tell us “My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.*”? So, although I may not be able on my own to fulfill this, He will bring it about by His grace and His strength, not my own. He will find the way for me to glorify Him, and by His abilities, it will happen. I don’t have to do a thing except be willing! He has a plan for my life and He will see me through to it.
So, even though there is still more to come, probably surgery for one, I have been looking at next steps. There are a few things on the horizon. I am excited about each and every one of them. I don’t want to discuss them, because they are just ideas and maybe’s right now. I don’t know which, if any, will come to fruition, but I am NOT worried. Here is another miracle. Maybe there is something I am unaware of, maybe I will never be conscience of how it is accomplished. It is much more to MY liking to find a goal and run head long into it – kind of a fool’s rush in, where angels fear kind of thing. But this time, from my lessons in surrender, I am so at peace with letting God lead where He will. I am excited and at peace at the same time. God is good. He has made a promise and kept it. I KNOW I can trust Him with this as well.