The Broken Heart Rock Goes on a new journey…
I had a teacher in high school who thought I was a quick study. I took 1st year Spanish, and the next year, she felt that my ability to grasp the language was so good she put me in 3rd year Spanish. It did not go well. Trips to the office, meetings with counselors and eventually the class was dropped. Apparently, God believes I am a quick study too. I hope we have better success this time. My life depends on it.
So, we left our story with me on a mountaintop. I had a wonderful meeting with God. He had taught me about surrender, how it felt to lay heartaches at His feet. Good lesson. Yay me. Well, like my high school teacher, He apparently thinks I got the lesson pretty well too. He is taking me from Surrender 101 to Surrender Eleventyseven01. I have been diagnosed with colon cancer. Surrender my WHAT????!!!!
On Friday afternoon, May 19th I had a colonoscopy. I knew when they brought my husband into the actual exam room, it couldn’t be good. My GI doctor was pretty sure she had found cancer in several spots on my lower intestines. Biopsies done, results to follow.
Have you ever been scared? I mean really terrified? I got the full meaning of “my blood ran cold” this weekend. The next 3 days were among the longest and scariest of my life. I got to experience the feeling of icicles running through my veins. I was only able to sleep for a couple of hours at a time, eating was difficult. I went to church on Sunday to hear a sermon on Ecclesiastes, and what the meaning of our suffering is. Once again, thanks God.
But, I do remember my lesson. I am looking to our Father. Someone posted on Facebook a verse this weekend: “Call upon me in the day of trouble; I will deliver you, and you shall glorify Me.” Psalms 50:15. I also remember Joshua 1:9, “Have I not commanded you? Be strong and of good courage; do not be afraid, nor be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” This is what I have hung onto these terrible days while my husband and I kept this mostly to ourselves and waited. We told some family, we told church leadership, so that prayers could begin immediately.
On Monday, the 22nd, I received the call from my doctor. While many of the spots higher in my colon/intestines where cleared, there is a spot in my colon that is indeed cancer. So, now it’s really real. This is a chapter that I and my family will have to walk through. We are not the first. We will not be the last. We are encouraged that it seems to be localized. A CT scan is the first stop on this journey. They will be looking to see if it has spread anywhere else.
Oddly perhaps, there is less fear now that I know. Perhaps not so odd. Now we can talk about it, now we can plan our attack. Now we can know how to pray. I am grateful for my friends; your prayers are what we need most. It is not hard to see how God has prepared me, how He has brought me to this place. I love how even in a very hard to hear sermon, the God-Who-Sees* is very evident. He even brought a precious lady to pray for me and remind me I am a Beloved-Daughter-of-God. The Broken-Heart-Rock! Beloved. Daughter. Of God.
*Genesis 16:13
Glo, so sorry to hear this. I’ve missed seeing you but chalked it up to the craziness of my work schedule and Tirzah’s needs these last few months. I’ll be praying for you.
Thank you Sharon! I’ve missed you too. Prayer welcome!
Gloria you and I have been friends for many years I just saw your post I am so very sorry to hear this news I personally do no that fear that you felt I will keep you and your family In my prayers I send you loving thoughts and prayers may the good Lord bless and keep you safe .
Thank you Lori. I got some good news today, and will be posting about it soon. Prayers welcome!